Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Monday, February 26, 2007

Religions Compared On A Common Base

Please note that this is not to insult or to castigate any religions whatsoever..

All religions have their paths to realisation, respect to others and the belief in the ultimate.. It is only when these beliefs cross paths, then conflict arises.

The below should be taken in the nature it is represented, and to laugh at the humor implied..

Taoism........Shit happens.
Buddhism...... If shit happens, it's not really shit
Islam........ If shit happens, it's the will of Allah.
Protestantism........ Shit happens because you don't work hard enough.
Judaism ........Why does this shit always happen to us?
Hinduism ........This shit happened before.
Catholicism ........ If you were good this shit wouldn't have happened.
Hare Krishna ....... Shit happens, rama rama.
T.V. Evangelism ........ Send more shit.
Atheism ........ No shit.
Jehova's Witness ........ Knock knock, shit happens.
Hedonism ........There's nothing like a good shit.
Christian Science ........Shit happens in your mind.
Agnosticism ........ Maybe shit happens, maybe it doesn't.
Existentialism ....... What is this shit anyway?
Stoicism ........ This shit doesn't bother me.
Rastafarianism ........Let's smoke this shit.

Celtic......Where did this shit come from.. the druid must have screwed up !

For those who feel their religions have not been included, please drop me a note !

Basically, we are all just the same, ie., the same book with different covers !

Sunday, February 25, 2007

MyBlogLog Bans ShoeMoney





MyBlogLog has banned one prominent SEO for publishing problems that he’s found with their service. Jeremy Schoemaker of the ShoeMoney blog showed how easily MyBlogLog members could pretend to be other people when visiting other MyBlogLog member websites.

Even though the method for doing this used information the service makes easy to find, they considered it misuse of MyBlogLog and banned Jeremy for doing it. In response, Jeremy called MyBlogLog’s staffers "idiots" and accused them of shopping people’s data to other web sites before Yahoo purchased them.

Marketing Pilgrim’s Andy Beal has had issues with MyBlogLog in the past, and is now boycotting them over the ShoeMoney banning.

Personally, what myblog does is entirely their business. Yes it is hard to swallow and is sometimes hits you really bad while getting banned. One of the main reasons being that you are just not prepared for it. Otherwise, banning has become an acceptable factor in online marketing. To put it in short.... Dude if you haven't got banned until now.. then you must be doing something wrong and you don't know the insider secrets. So it's high time to go buy yourself one of those "black books"... :):)

On the other side, any client ought to read the privacy laws prior to signing up and most companies have you by your "well whatever" if you read the fine print ! So there ain't any reason to get hot.. because getting hot only makes things worse..

So basically, all's fair in love and online marketing !

Nonetheless, Eric ought to sort this out asap....

Do the dew

A convenience store clerk in Florida is facing prison time after a nasty practical joke.

Anthony Mesa urinated in a bottle of Mountain Dew, which a customer later drank. Obvioulsy, Mesa faces six months in jail, after pleading no contest in court. According to local authorities, Mesa urinated in the soda bottle and put it back in the refrigerator. The tainted soda was later drunk by a construction worker, who has settled a civil complaint against the store.

Nice way to do the dew !

Built-In Floatation Devices





Now these are things which really scare you numb... are they boobs or footballs ?

What's going on with people...

Phew .. Women ! Would even get knocked out to get that extra attention on themselves !

And you think your job stinks !





Whenever, you are down and out.. and complaining about your job.. think of what these people have to go through !

Friday, February 23, 2007

Headlines from the year 2030

White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's [ formerly known as California ].. third language...

Child onceived naturally and naturally scientists are stumped...

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage...

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking ...

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs ...

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now actually can photograph a woman with her mouth shut...

Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches...

And finally last but not the least... IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent...

Einstein's Theory of Relative Titty

Very few remember that after Albert Einsten's first marriage dissolved in 1919, the Nobel Prize winner married his cousin, Elsa Lowenthal.

He stated that he was attracted to Elsa because she was "well endowed"

He postulated that if you are attracted to women with large breasts, the attraction is stronger than if there is a DNA connection.

It was called.... Einstein's Theory of Relative Titty !!

Some Nuts !





Must be 'chief big nuts' !

Chocolate.... Anyway you want..

Chocolate....

There are few foods that people feel as passionate about -- a passion that goes beyond a love for the "sweetness" of most candies

But basically, Chocolate is a psychoactive food.

It is made from the seeds of the tropical cacao tree, Theobroma cacao. The cacao tree was named by the 17th century Swedish naturalist, Linnaeus. The Greek term theobroma means literally "food of the gods".

Cacao beans were used by the Aztecs to prepare a hot, frothy beverage with stimulant and restorative properties. Chocolate itself was reserved for warriors, nobility and priests. The Aztecs esteemed its reputed ability to confer wisdom and vitality. Taken fermented as a drink, chocolate was also used in religious ceremonies. The sacred concoction was associated with Xochiquetzal, the goddess of fertility. Emperor Montezuma allegedly drank 50 goblets a day. Aztec taxation was levied in cacao beans. 100 cacao beans could buy a slave. 12 cacao beans bought the services of courtesan.

Chocolate has also been called the food of the devil; but the theological basis of this claim is obscure.

It is the solid and fat combination, sweetened with sugar and other ingredients, that is made into chocolate bars and which is today commonly referred to as chocolate. It can also be made into drinks (called cocoa and hot chocolate). It is also a common ingredient in many kinds of confections such as chocolate candy, ice cream, cookies, cakes, pies, chocolate mousse, and other desserts. It is one of the more popular (or at least recognizable) flavours in the world.

Chocolate and Dogs

While the pathetic begging look that goes across the face of a dog wanting chocolate can weaken the most stoic dog owner, stay firm. Do not give in. Ever. Once dogs have tasted chocolate, they want more. And for dogs, that's a bad thing.

You might disagree, thinking back to a time when you noticed a dog enjoying a tidbit of chocolate with no deleterious effect. Don't be fooled.

The problem, according to veterinary experts, is that eating a speck of chocolate leads a dog to crave more. It can mean that your dog will jump at a opportunity to get any type of chocolate, not knowing that certain chocolates are more lethal than other types. Larger amounts of chocolate, particularly of the most toxic type, can bring about seizures in some dogs, and in all dogs, can kill.

Chocolate is lethal to dogs because it contains theobromine. A naturally occurring stimulant found in the cocoa bean, theobromine increases urination and affects the central nervous system as well as heart muscle. While amounts vary by type of chocolate, it's the theobromine that is poisonous to dogs.

Basically, white chocolate is the safest, relatively speaking because it has the least amount of theobromine.... Bottomline, just be extra careful and check your manual in regards to the amount you can give them, if you are very particular on giving them chocolate..

Now for some fantastic information ... Fourteen reasons on why chocolate is better than sex...

Do not disturb.... Chocolate fantasy in progress...

  1. You can GET chocolate
  2. Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft
  3. You can safely have chocolate while you are driving
  4. You can make chocolate last as long as you want it to
  5. You can have chocolate even in front of your mother
  6. Two people of the same sex can have chocolate without being called nasty names
  7. The word "commitment" doesn't scare off chocolate
  8. You can have chocolate on top of your workbench or desk during working hours without upsetting your work mates
  9. You can ask a stranger for chocolate without getting your face slapped
  10. With chocolate there's no need to fake it
  11. You can have chocolate at any time of the month
  12. You can have as many kinds of chocolate as you can handle
  13. You are never too young or too old for chocolate
  14. When you have chocolate it does not keep your neighbors awake
  15. With chocolate size doesn't matter and on top it all, it's always good
Now for some chocolate creativity at is best...
Perhaps this is why they say its passion goes beyond a love for the "sweetness" of most candies


Crapola Chocolate Poop




Virgin Airways ?






Peters Pan ?







Would make a killing selling this..


Bottomline.... Einstein was eating chocolate when he came upon the theory of relativity.


Please excuse me if any of the images causes you any offense... they are only chocolate and are not meant to be of any offensive nature.... after all its to be eaten and who cares what form chocolate comes !



Thursday, February 22, 2007

The O J Commercial - Want Sex !



The Activa Orange Juice Commercial... highlighting the necessity of orange juice, fitness mentality, and set in tune with the market moods with the catch phrase of "want sex" emphasizing a sexual element to the whole ad....

Fabulous advert...... definitely, exemplies modern times and market mentality

Don't you just like it ?

Let me have your views....

Thought for the day... Joseph E. Levine

You can fool all the people all the time if the advertising is right and the budget is big enough.....

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

Thought for the day - 100 Years Ago

Hundred Years Ago...

Marijuana, heroin, and morphine were all available over the counter at corner drugstores.

According to one pharmacist, Heroin clears the complexion, gives buoyancy to the mind, regulates the stomach and the bowels, and is, in fact, a perfect guardian of health.

And they say Woodstock was the beginning of the "flower period"

To top it all...

Coca-Cola contained cocaine instead of caffeine.... Well that would have been great, you don't need a vodka to go with it to get high ....

And to talk of sex... just check this out..

Some medical authorities warned that professional seamstresses were apt to become sexually aroused by the steady rhythm, hour after hour, of the sewing machine's foot pedals. They recommended slipping bromide into the women's drinking water... The bromide apparently was thought to diminish sexual desire...

Must advise friends to include this bromide thingy, while socalising with nymphos !

Lastly, there were about 230 reported murders in the U.S. annually......

Analysing the above data, even this figure seemed bloody high....

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Thought for the day - Hair..

Men have more hair on their chest than women, but on the (w)hole woman have more...



Wise saying..... To exemplify the above a bit...

There was this sexy blonde who went to the doctor complaining of body odour... Do you wash ? the doctor asked the smelly blonde.

"Oh, yes," the blonde said... Each morning, I start at my head and wash down as far as possible. Then I start at my feet and I wash up as far as possible...

Well....... the doctor concluded, Go home and wash "possible"


Can you imagine a couple of years ago, say in the 1800's, most women only washed their hair only once a month and used borax or egg yolks for shampoo.... phew !

Thought for the day - The Theory of Relativity

An erection is like the Theory of Relativity... the more you think about it, the harder it gets.

Monday, February 19, 2007

Thought for the day - Viagra

Viagra now available in a powder form so as to put it in your tea.

Unfortunately, it does nothing for erections, but stops your biscuit from going SOFT ...

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Thought for the day - Leadership ...

Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done, because he wants to do it.

Friday, February 16, 2007

Getting Him or Her Back!

Are You Suffering From A Broken Relationship...

Did you and end your relationship suddenly leaving you filled with questions, anxiety and depression? Or did you split after a lengthy period of constant arguing and unpleasant disagreements ?

Whatever maybe the reason for your separation, you do hold the key to SUCCESSFULLY retrieving your ex., and even have him or her fight for your relationship like you wished he or she would!

The manual is for you if....

You are truly in love with your ex.
You truly want to make your ex happy.
You feel you can never be happy again without this person.
You can see marriage and family with this person, or a re-marriage.

If you answered yes to all of these attributes, then it is recommended you order this manual. The longer you wait, the longer it will take for a successful turn around.

This Manual will show you..

The steps you MUST take before trying to get him or her back.
The mistakes you most likely have made which pushed your ex away.
The mistakes you are still making which is only making things worse.
What you can do to get his or her attention back.
How to successfully reel him or her back and
How to keep your new relationship with your ex.

Although, there is no guarantee, 90% of the time, the tips revealed to you in This Manual will work !

CLICK HERE NOW


advice diva

Thought for the day - liberal bloggers !

Can liberal bloggers be.. both... partisan kingmakers and independent journalists ?

Please let me have your views... as such a feeling or thought itself is towards curbing blogging freedom...

So, appreciate any feedback ...

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Confessions from a cybersexlayaboutandneerdowell

It is estimated that Seventy-five percent of Japanese women own vibrators.

The global average is 47 percent

The maximum depth at which vaginal stimulation occurs is only 2"

And talk about being shagged, let alone a headache, when asked for sex ! Phew

A female orgasm is a powerfull painkiller (because of the release of endorfines), so headaches are in fact a bad excuse not to have sex

One in three men cheats on his partner, as opposed to one in four women. Only 28% of female cheaters get caught

By the way... a "cybersexlayaboutandneerdowell" is a person who reads sex trivia pages on the Internet

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Sipping Vodka And Sermon !

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done.

The monsignor replied, " When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip."

So next Sunday he took the monsignor's advice.

At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink.

He proceeded to talk up a storm.

Upon his return to his office after the mass, he found the following note on the door:

1) Sip the vodka, don't gulp.

2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.

3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.

4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.

5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass

6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.

7) The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the spook.

8) David slew Goliath, he did not kick the $$=+ out of him.

9) When David was hit by a rock and was knocked off his donkey, don't say he was stoned off his ass.

10)We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T."

11)What Jesus said at the last supper was "take this bread and eat it for it's my body." He did not say.. Eat me

12)The Virgin Mary is not called " Mary with the Cherry,.

13)The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, Yeah God.

14)Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St.Peter's not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's

Thought for the day... Another Brit In The Wall

Did you hear Pink Floyd remade one of their songs in memory of Lady Di, much like Elton John did?

It's called "Another Brit in the Wall"

Sunday, February 11, 2007

What is random images

This is a question I have asked myself and by others as well... So to put any speculation to rest.. here goes..

The answer would be better understood, from the below mentioned anecdote..

A psychiatrist asked her multiple personality disorder patient, So, do you feel like you’re cured. He replied, Absolutely.... We have never felt better !!

So it is a collection of multiple images and musings... originating from a single source depending upon that day, but could be from any personality . That is to say that the market moods on a particular day could be schizophrenic, neurotic, paranoid or even something new, and also how and when the images and thoughts appear..

Perhaps now, the focus is not essentially on a topic's meaning nor context..

So, then what is it then..

I really don't know, but all I do is to organise these random thoughts and try to make sense out of it !

Perhaps some of us are able to make some sense out of these. Iin fact, all of us are able to make sense out of it in our own ways, but it is those people who are able to market their thoughts, ideas, musings and images, and ofcourse are able to convince others, that have an impact on the market !

In short, these are the thoughts and images that drive the market..

Sometime back during a survey, they arrived at a conclusion that over 70% of the Americans [unconfirmed source] suffered from some form of neurosis. But only a few were diagnosed with it... why was that so ?

Basically, because they are not able to cope up with the flow of images, thoughts, musings, and more so, because the others classify them as neurotics.. Now if someone was to take time off to decipher and understand them, there definitely would be an immense amount of information to be obtained from them [don't ask me how]. But the problem is deciphering this information, mainly because, one cannot program ourselves to do that..

Why ? Because it is a catch-22 situation...

Trying or coming down to that level would be to lose our basic, so-called sanity... which is defined by others... the very reason that these people have been classified as neurotics

Now let it rest there and let's no go too deep into that... and comeback to our subject topic

So this is just a collection of few such musings and images - take it or leave it !

As they have recently seem to generate some feedback, it means some of the ideas are being accepted... but is those musings of the past which tend to have more acceptance..

Like everything else, 95 percent of us cannot spot an opportunity when we get one, yours truly included

Why ?

As mentioned earlier, musings and images have no value if they are not understood properly.. ofcourse unless you are a Freud or some other character... only when somebody understands it and responds accordingly or if someone else buys it and markets it, then it has some value

Reckon this is why renaissance painters are in such demand !

Now, why is it that a majority of the images don't have a meaning or are not accepted. It could be mainly due to various matters, stronger market forces, geographical locations, immediate surroundings, media and ofcourse good ole politics..

So, let me warn you that "random images" has been written with the help of connections, who do not understand most of its meaning, unless spoken aloud [or rather thought aloud ].

Ofcourse there are a few exceptions and the stress on these market connections is too much.. As a result, there is very little synchronization or synergy, when penning these down And as a result you get an absolute "bizarre" feedback.

The only, funny genuine feedback that these musings generate is that, each word or image is analyzed, leading to total confusion... To paraphrase that in detail, folks generally want to know the source, rather than what it means or in what context it was referred to..

Perhaps searching for some response from an UFO or an extra-terrestrial life-form would be easier

Nonetheless, do drop by once in a while and provide your two bits now and then..

It would be nice to hear from those who may be in the same frequency level... or from those who are just are in search for some link, feedback or response to market moods, musings and images whatever it may be..

Funny Condom Commercial

Funny condom commercial from Durex ....

The message couldn't have been put across better !




Funny, nonetheless, must have taken a lot of convincing to make all those guys walk around in that costume... guess money talks !

Saturday, February 10, 2007

Thought for the day... Mary Pettibone Poole

He who laughs.... lasts !

Kabbalah..the world’s oldest body of spiritual wisdom

Kabbalah... the world’s oldest body of spiritual wisdom... contains the long-hidden keys to the secrets of the universe as well as the keys to the mysteries of the human soul.

Kabbalistic teachings explain the complexities of the material and the nonmaterial universe, as well as the physical and metaphysical nature of all humanity.

Kabbalah shows in detail, how to navigate that vast terrain in order to remove every form of chaos, pain, and suffering. For thousands of years, the great kabbalistic sages have taught that every human being is born with the potential for greatness.

Kabbalah is the means for activating that potential.

Kabbalah has always been meant to be used, not just learned.

Its primary purpose is to bring clarity, understanding, and freedom to our lives, and ultimately to erase even death itself.

Friday, February 09, 2007

Depression and easy solutions to getting out of it

Why do people dwell on past memories?

Why do people cope up with all this suffering, when there is nothing, and if at all there is any, it is only equivalent to something that should be flushed down a toilet.

Basically, the common characteristics of depression are failure, to comprehend realities, losing track of your regular activities, becoming disorganized, dwelling on past miseries and this innate fear that something bad might happen to people whom you like. Worst of all, you tend to gain satisfaction from these…

In short, very few people come to terms with the fact that they have it or accept the fact that they suffer from it…. Perhaps, if depression was referred to orgasm, with the same traits a lot of people would only willingly accept it… mainly because of the fear of faking it….

So what does this imply…. We have it yet we find it hard in accepting it…. Just because of the name…

So, it may be easy in resolving or coming to terms with it….. In fact it is easier than you think.

But it takes some time, a bottle of common sense, some selfishness and a lit bit of the devil in you.

I say this not because, you have to come to terms with the prevailing social system first, and then to slowly shake of the social supporters of such a system.

In short, like in every aspect of work or business, people need a scapegoat, and it is high time you realize that if you are not careful, then they tend to make you the evangelical scapegoat. Unfortunately, by the time you realize that it’s too late...

Hence the faster you come to terms with yourself, the better… so where do we start ?

Take time off, and handle each one of your hypothetical miseries [ the ones you are afraid off and the ones you try to hide ]

Don’t give way to any anger or remorse. But pass these miseries down to people as if you are sharing something valuable with them… that is to say…. imagine that you have received a huge parcel of food or something even more valuable, and you would like to share that with your friends as you normally would do…

Don’t ever make that appear like a hand-me-downs… that it is to say… that you are passing it on to them because you have too much of that item [be it food or whatever] and you have little choice but to share it.

Basically, make it appear to them as something valuable and generate from them a word of genuine thank you feeling… In this way, you too won’t feel bad about what you are doing.

Unfortunately, you have to be a little selfish, or else others would do it to you and you wouldn’t realize it… A champion giver is one who receives thanks, commendations and even gifts in return for something he passes on… Talk about buying miseries…. This is advertising/ public relations at its best...

After a week, list down the number of miseries and fears left.

Should there be no improvement, don’t despair. Go back to the same schedule, and you realize that a few of your old hypothetical fears and worries don’t seem to bother you anymore...

Do this again after two weeks. Note the improvement.

Now, also you would start receiving feedbacks from the people you have shared your prizes. If there is a positive response, then you are on the road to recovery….

Alternately, if your friends, colleagues, neighbors or relatives start politely turning down your prize giving habit, then you have something to worry about... Also note, don’t overdo your generosity...

It could also help, if you discuss your misapprehensions and problems with a counselor or a third-party whom you can trust...

Just remember that this is a common social problem… and that people refer it to by different names...

Each week or two weeks, change your approaches, modus operandi and you would be on the road to recovery.

Perhaps, it would even turn out to be one of the best experiences and lessons you ever learn.

Dude, you will enjoy it after that… believe me.

Most of all it gives you an inner confidence that you never knew that you had it in you, all along

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Thought for the day... Sir Winston Churchill

It is impossible to obtain a conviction for sodomy from an English jury. Half of them don't believe that it can physically be done, and the other half are doing it..

Murphy...

Well a fifty-fifty, isn't so bad..... cheers for transvestitism !

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Sex and orgasm

Sex is a wonderful thing. I haven't met a person yet who would dispute this. Everybody loves sex, whether they like talking about it openly or not.

One of the reasons you're reading this is because you enjoy sex and you would like to enjoy it more and have your partner enjoy it more.

Sex can be the greatest pleasure a person can ever experience or a major disappointment. Surveys have shown that 75% of women fake orgasm every time, 15% faked it most of the time and about 9.5% said they occasionally faked it. Which leaves about 0.5% who said they never faked it. I know most of you men out there will find this hard to believe, but it's true. Please note .. this was said by a woman…..

Women, by faking orgasms, are missing out on one of the most pleasurable experiences imaginable but so are their partners. Both the male and females sexual pleasure increases to unbelievable new heights once you know how to bring a woman to an orgasm every time. Your woman will want you as never before, she will never want or need another man.

And girls, if you want to have better sex, then teach your man what I am about to tell you. Most men are anxious to learn how to satisfy women during sex and most of them [around 90%] get it wrong….

It is generally easy for men to become sexually aroused because his sexual organs are on the outside of the body and are easily stimulated. Sex would get boring if the pleasure is all one sided, don't you think so..guys? Imagine having sex every few days and never reaching an orgasm. Doesn't sound like much fun does it?

Some men can get a woman worked into a sexual frenzy during foreplay, but then when it comes to intercourse, the momentum doesn't continue and in most cases, both the man and woman don't know what is wrong.

Basically, only a woman really knows how to satisfy a woman. Only a woman knows the physical sensations and errogeneous zones of a woman's body. Since every woman is different, it is difficult to list every area that turns her on or off.

The erogenous zones on women can be a constant source of excitement and pleasure. By knowing how to properly stimulate these areas, you'll have her practically ripping your clothes off, begging for sex.

Intimacy and the pleasure that builds up to sex is really what does it for the woman. In fact, most will probably tell you that if you have good foreplay the sex will be more intense and the orgasm will be better as a result.

So how do you know where to start ?

These errogeneous are the areas on a woman which produce excitement whenever stimulated. While you might think the only erogenous zone on a woman is her breasts, in truth there are a lot of areas which can get her excited when properly stimulated.These include her neck, her hands, her ears, her feet and her inner thighs. Try stroking these areas … you'll definitely rock her world!

Another method is to tease your partner, ie., to say women like affection. They like to have their bodies gently caressed.

While there are a number of ways to please a woman, a great lover knows the key to fulfilling her every desire starts before the act of sex. If you can find her "sweet-spots", then you'll be one step closer to giving her the big "O"! What are these sweet spots?

Undress her slowly. Take special care and attention as you kiss the areas that become bare as you remove her clothing. If she likes naughty play lay her on her stomach and talk dirty to her while you caress her.!Take this opportunity to search for her g spot. If you are unsure of where the g spot is there are several vibrators and dildos on the market that are targeted to stimulate this area. This will start to drive her crazy. You have created a desire for her.

You are not giving her something she wants. You are in total control, she is being driven insane by now. You have created an excitement and desire within her sexual being. When you feel she is ready - she will let you know it is time to move on to the next step.

Then, you're both ready to go.

You haven't gone to all this effort to blow it all now, pardon the pun.

Now - you've got to really start torturing her.Keep teasing until the point of surrender She may have several more orgasms or only one more. Two to five is the norm, and this may be the first one she's had in a long time. If you've been able to keep going past the first one, that's great, but even if you cum now, it will be one of the deepest and most incredible orgasms you yourself have ever had.

You won't be sorry you took the chance to explore her in such intimate ways as you give her a night she may never forget !



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Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Mortgage Calculator: Lose that Stress from Doing the Math Yourself

When considering a mortgage loan, knowing how much money you have and will have and how much you are willing to pay for the loan including the interest and principal is very, very important. To help you decide on projecting how much you will be paying bi-weekly or monthly, depending on the payment term you choose for the entire loan period of your mortgage, various mortgage calculators are available.

These mortgage calculators are categorized into 15 classifications depending on the type of mortgage you want and the terms in interests and principal you want to apply. These classifications for mortgage calculators are the following:

a. Mortgage calculator to determine a borrowers ability to afford a house. This type of calculator can be classified into two. There is a mortgage calculator that determines if a borrower can afford a house and mortgage calculator to help the borrower determine if it is better for him to make a small down payment or no down payment at all or save up first, then make a bigger down payment later on.

b. Mortgage calculator for consolidating non-mortgage debt. There are three types of calculators under these. The first one is used for borrowers who want to consider merging non-mortgage debt in their bought mortgage. The second type of mortgage calculator is for those who want to consider refinancing their mortgage by cash-out or by taking another mortgage. The third kind is for borrowers who already have 2 mortgages for a particular loan and are considering other options to help pay off the 1st mortgage.

c. Mortgage calculator to determine the monthly payments of their mortgage. The types of mortgage calculator to be used will depend on the terms you choose. There is a mortgage calculator for fixed rate mortgages, adjustable rate mortgages without negative amortizations, adjustable rate mortgages with negative amortizations, adjustable rate mortgages with flexible amortizations and mortgage payments with temporary buy downs.

d. Mortgage calculator to determine how much interest borrowers can save should he decide to pay an additional amount for the principal value during payment. The mortgage calculator varies depending on the number of payments a borrower is willing to give. These are extra monthly payments, bi-weekly payments applied monthly, bi-weekly payments applied bi-weekly and extra monthly payments to be paid in a specific period.

e. Mortgage calculator to determine if refinancing a mortgage will reduce its cost. This type of mortgage calculator can be applied to a borrower who wants to refinance a mortgage or 2 mortgages. Other calculators are used to determine if refinancing one mortgage into two can reduce costs while others are used to determine if cash-out refinancing is better than deciding to take on a second mortgage.

f. Mortgage calculator for determining the length of time borrowers have to pay insurance premiums applied to their mortgage.

g. Mortgage calculator to determine amortizations. There are 2 kinds of these. One determines the savings a borrower can have on his tax on the interests and the second mortgage calculator determines the appreciation of property being mortgaged.

h. Mortgage calculator to compare two mortgages. These are different types of calculators that compare the various mortgages that include amortizations and non-amortizations, government and non-government loans, fixed rate and adjustable interests.

i. Mortgage calculator to compute points and fees in a mortgage. The calculator is used to determine the rate of return of ARMs (Adjustable Rate Mortgages) and FRMs (Flexible Rate Mortgages) and the amount that can be saved or lost by using paying points for interest reduction on FRMs.

j. Mortgage calculator for determining amounts to be paid for a mortgage insurance and down payment and

k. Mortgage calculator to determine the feasibility of having a mortgage loan in a shorter term.

These mortgage calculators and other various mortgage calculators are available for use in the Internet. Companies such as Freddie Mac, Fannie Mae, Real-Time-Rates.Com and Mortgage-X have interactive pages in their websites where you can do your calculations online. Aside from these, other sites such as HSH Associates give free downloads of their loan calculators.